Hauntingly Beautiful

Hey there,

So, here’s another playlist I put together.

It’s based on an IG friend’s music taste. We both had a shared obsession with Kyoya, and we totally bonded over it. She was really into those hauntingly beautiful songs that kind of linger with you, long after they’re over. I just know she’d lose her mind over this playlist and honestly, I think you might, too.

Sometimes I wonder how she’s doing now. We met through this random dump account I had before, but I deactivated it and can’t get it back anymore.

It made me think how wild it is for people to drift in and out of your life. Sometimes they’re only around for a little while, but I feel like those short connections still mean something. Like, at least I got to know her and share some music that’ll always remind me of our little friendship. That’s a memory I’ll keep.

– Nostalgicbelle✨

Holy Chill

Haluu,

How are you doing??

Can we just take a second to process that it’s NOVEMBER already?! The month most associated with horror 👻. So, in the spirit of all things eerie, I thought I’d share something that genuinely freaked me out just to add to the atmosphere, hehee.

There’s actually a reason why I created this playlist.

Back when I was in college, I used to wake up randomly between 2 to 3 a.m., or sometimes exactly at 3:00 a.m., for no reason at all. At the time, everyone was talking about how it was the “devil’s hour,” so naturally, I was fully spooked. I got so scared that I eventually stopped checking the time I didn’t want confirmation.

Then one night, I woke up extra freaked out. Like, straight-up panicking for no reason, and feeling this weird, dizzy sensation. It felt like… something was trying to take over my body? Like I was being possessed. I was so scared and confused. I had no idea what was happening or why I was feeling that way.

In full survival mode, I started rummaging through my phone looking for any song that could basically un-demon me. Thank GOD I had one worship song saved.

I played it and I swear I felt myself being unpossessed.

The song was “I Am Nothing” by Ginny Owens, and let me tell you.I played that on repeat like my life depended on it. And after a few loops, I finally felt… normal again. Calm. I even drifted back to sleep.

I still don’t know how it worked. Maybe it’s just full of positive energy? Maybe there’s some spiritual magic coded into the melody? Who knows. All I know is that whatever power lives in that song… it worked.

So now, if this ever happens again, I’ve got a playlist on standby for my very own personal exorcism session.

2023 playlist

Hiiiii!

It’s the end of the year.

This one started kinda off, maybe that’s what I felt with most of the start of my year in the past too but this year has turned out different from what I expected.

If I had to choose a line to describe this year, it would be:
“Last year I abstained; this year I devour without guilt, which is also an art.” —Margaret Atwood

This was the year I took my first solo out of the country trip to Japan. I still don’t know where I found the nerve, but I did. And for someone like me (introvert, daydreamer), that meant everything.

This year a lot didn’t work out. A few things went sideways. But I like the thought that there’s no such thing as failure, only redirection. And maybe the peace comes from knowing I made the best choices I could, with what I knew, in that exact moment.

Below is a playlist I curated for 2023. I didn’t listen to it the whole year (I’ve been listening to podcasts), but it holds the songs I discovered and replayed. Maybe you’ll find something in it, too.

– Belle ⭐

Christmas Playlist

Haluuu,

It’s only a few days until Christmas. Have you wrapped your gifts yet? Or maybe lit up your space with a little holiday magic?

I just finished setting up our tree in the living room and hung a parol outside. Usually, I start decorating the moment the -ber months arrive, but this year… the spirit didn’t come as easily.

Still, I made this playlist to keep the feeling alive. Maybe you’ve felt it too? That quiet shift as we grow older, when the magic of the season feels just a little out of reach.

Sometimes, a song can bring it back. Even for a moment.

Wishing you a Merry Christmas,
Belle🎄

My fav Taylor Swift Tracks in 2023

The first Taylor Swift song I ever heard was Love Story. It was also my first favorite. I loved it so much, I wrote the lyrics down by hand and memorized every word (at that time I’m not really good at memorizing at school). I even translated it into Tagalog once, just so I could show a friend how beautiful it was.

Now, years later, Peace is my favorite.

There’s something quiet and devastating about it. I interpret it as a song about feeling like your very existence disrupts someone else’s peace. And yet, that person stays and loves you unconditionally. Accepts you for who you are not just the soft, admirable parts, but the difficult ones too. And in that, there’s a bittersweet question: Can you love me even if I can’t give you peace?

I made a playlist of my favorite Taylor Swift songs this year. If you’d like to sit with them for a while, it’s linked below.

2022 Playlist

Helloooooooo!!!

I hope your day’s going well.

Here a playlist I made back in 2022. I’ve decided that from now on, I’ll make a playlist for every year. Just like a little time capsule for each season of my life.

In 2022, I learned how to be alone. Not just the physical kind, but the emotional kind. And honestly? It’s not as bad as I once thought.

I remember reading a quote before that said something like, “You’re born alone and you’ll die alone.” At the time, I liked it in a poetic kind of way, but I didn’t fully understand it. Now I think I do. I understand why a character would say something like that and mean it.

Sometimes I wonder if I really am meant to be alone. Maybe if I had just gone with the flow and stopped bending myself into shapes to keep people from leaving, I’d be alone by now. But maybe that wouldn’t be such a terrible thing after all.

I know I’ve said the word alone too many times already… but oh well. If I’m going to be alone, I might as well do cool things, go to beautiful places, and make the best playlists while I’m at it.

With love (and a little solitude),
– LonelyBelle

Vecna Playlist

Hiii…

I made this playlist just in case Vecna (from Stranger Things) tries to take me hahah but honestly? I’d probably go with him willingly after finding out he’s played by Jamie 😳.

I’ve had a crush on him ever since I saw him in The Mortal Instruments. So if this is my “running up that hill” moment… I guess I’ll be vibing on the way out 🫠

– Belle

Just Like Magic

Hi there,

Here’s my first playlist blog for the year 2022.

Since it’s a new year, I’m taking this as a chance for a fresh start. Last year… I’m not even sure what happened. All I know is that it wasn’t good. It was a mess. I was a mess.

But this year, I want to try something different. I want to cultivate self-worth, embrace self-love, and shift into a more positive mindset and then see where that takes me.

When I was younger, I used to imagine myself as characters from the books I’d read. I’d ask myself, “What would they do if they were me?” It helped me get through difficult moments. It was easier to take action when I could borrow the bravery or clarity of a fictional character who always seemed to know what to do.

There were traits these characters had that I wished I had like confidence, boldness, self-esteem. Traits that don’t just appear with the snap of a finger. Now that I’m older, I’ve been thinking more about the idea of a “highest self.” It’s not exactly a fictional character, but not quite real yet either. Just a version of me in the future, if things go well.

So, I made a playlist that reflects the energy of that version of me. The one I’m slowly becoming. The one I’m manifesting. I hope you enjoy it, and I hope it brings you a little closer to your own highest self too.

With love,
– Belle

2021 Playlist

Hello there,

We’re nearing the end of the year.

This year started out okay for me, even brightly. Then a full-blown high. And now? It’s dropped. Hard.

It’s made me wonder… Is there a thin line between happiness and rage? Because lately, I’ve been dancing on that line more often than I’d like.

I’ve been feeling rage but it’s not the dramatic, screaming kind. It’s the quiet burn that disappears before anyone even notices. It fizzles so fast that I’m only left with the guilt like an aftertaste.

Unrelated, but I’ll leave you with something I’ve been circling around lately:

Love isn’t supposed to feel like a chore, a burden, or an obligation.

And yet… this year, I was lucky to feel a sweet kind of love. Like honey. But why does it still feel heavy on my chest?

…Maybe I’m just a mosquito?

With conflicted feelings,
– Belle

Novacain

Dear You,

It’s October 31.

The last day of the month… so Happy (Hollow)Halloween?

Lately, I’ve found myself wondering:

What if I could feel nothing at all?

No pain, no sadness, no anger.

But if I felt nothing… would I still be alive?

Living means feeling everything at once.

And maybe we need grief in order to recognize joy.

Maybe the hard moments are what sharpen the beautiful ones, making them feel real.

I like to think that sorrow teaches us how to hold happiness more gently when it finally arrives.

P.S. I made a playlist to recreate the sensation of Novacain through songs. A little emotional anesthesia.

If you have time, I’d love for you to listen.

With care,
– Belle